To Change Our Life

Each one of us,

regardless of our circumstances,

has the abilty to change.

We can change how we think and what we think about.

We can change what and how we speak.

We can change how we behave.

Doing so,

we will change our lives.

As Uncomprehending As Children

Question: When we asked what you had to say about the disaster in Haiti, you reminded us of the principles of Karma. All the people who are affected by this tragedy are experiencing the result of their own actions, perhaps from another lifetime. This is difficult for me to understand. For one thing - if they are getting what they deserve - how does compassion enter the picture? Wouldn't it be easy to see people in trouble and dismiss them because it's their own fault?

Response: Throughout our innumerable lifetimes, not knowing about or not truly understanding the natural law of causality, we have thought and acted without considering the consequences. We were ignorant. And we still are. 

We were, and are, like children who act impulsively without thinking about what could happen.

Just as we feel compassion for the child who burns his hand on the stove or who hurts herself falling out of a tree, we feel compassion for those who bring suffering upon themselves through their own actions. They were ignorant. Just like us.

To understand that suffering is brought about by one's actions allows us to learn from the situation. It also gives us the opportunity to deepen our compassion through the practice of the giving of wealth (time and effort not just money) and fearlessness.

To dismiss that suffering as the person's own fault is to be judgmental, not compassionate.

No matter how big or old the other person, they are actually children when it comes to realizing the pervasiveness of causality.

Just like us.

Non-attachment not Detachment

(Some entries bear repeating. . . )

Question: I was talking to a friend and she told me "she tried" Buddhism but the following was her reason for not pursuing it further: "I don't think that it is a good thing to detach from the body and all emotions.  I believe that passion and emotions are part of the best part of being human.  So... pure detachment leaves me feeling un-human."

Response: I imagine "pure detachment" would leave any reasonable person feeling un-human. But Buddhism does not teach pure detachment.

In Buddhism, the opposite of attachment is not detachment but rather non-attachment. Detachment is unresponsive and removed from emotions. Non-attachment allows us to feel the emotions but not become trapped by them.  When we are non-attached, we still care but we no longer discriminate, feeling love for this person and aversion for another. When we practice non-attachment, we are letting go of worries and expectations. We are fully engaged in what we do, but we realize the act of doing is all we control. As Master Kuang-ch'in said, "Non-attachment does not mean indifference or carelessness, but rather you should do your best and not worry about the results."

Neither do we "detach from the body." We wisely realize it is not permanent and that it is not our true self. It is a temporary dwelling for this lifetime. But we still need to take care of it and treat it with respect as we try to find the balance between hedonism and asceticism. 

Those I know who excel at non-attachment are some of the most engaged, hard-working, and cheerful people I know. Practicing as the Buddha taught, they are a joy to be around. Just thinking of them makes me smile.

I Resolve

I resolve not to kill.

Instead, I will respect all beings.

I resolve not to steal.

Instead, before taking or using anything that does not belong to me,

I will ask permission of the owner.

I resolve not to engage in sexual misconduct, or any sensory indulgence.

Instead, I will develop the mind of self-restraint and purity.

I resolve not to use false speech.

Instead, I will speak the truth in a wise way and at the right time.

I resolve not to use harsh speech.

Instead, I will speak words that benefit others and foster peace. 

I resolve not to use divisive speech.

Instead, I will speak words that foster harmony and understanding. 

I resolve not to use enticing speech.

Instead, I will speak sincerely and truthfully.

I resolve to refrain from greed.

Instead, I will open my heart and practice giving.

I resolve to refrain from anger.

Instead, I will develop patience

and the compassion to see the suffering of others.

I resolve to refrain from ignorance.

Instead, I will discipline myself and calm my mind

so that I can face everything with wisdom.



Tahdah!!!

 The

How Will I Behave Today and the Rest of My Life?

website is published

and working!

It's the "working" part that gets the TADAH!. The digital eBooks took some work, hence I kept toting my 17" laptop back and forth to our IT building for Mr. Tao to help me publish the new format and then attempt to figure out why it wasn't working. I was afraid that people would either think that he wasn't very good at fixing computers (he is) or I was really tough on computers (don't think I am).

We started with our Australia server, then tried our Hong Kong server, and ended up on our China server. So the site is a touch slow, but it WORKS!

I'm so happy...

Oh! Click on Jacques and he'll do the rest.