I resolve not to use harsh speech. 

Instead, I will speak words that 

benefit others and foster peace. 

The paramita of giving involves three categories: wealth, teachings, and fearlessness. When we give fearlessness, we ease others’ distress and nurture their feelings of safety. If, however, we’re using bad language, belittling others, offending or hurting others with our abrasive speech or tone of voice, raising our voices—we’re using harsh speech.

And we’re giving fear.

Not fearlessness.

Our speech can have lasting effects. The harsh words we blurt out will be stored in our consciousness. We also run the genuine risk of having them firmly embedded in the other person’s consciousness as well. In the heat of the moment, when we’re too wrapped up in our feelings to allow our mindfulness to weigh in on what we’re about to say, we create great harm.

What to do? Remain silent. Listen to the other person. Think before opening our mouth.