Offering criticism in a timely, respectful manner.

(Part One) 

Discerning when and how to criticize someone remains a skill few of us have mastered.

Let’s face it, we haven’t even grasped the more basic issue of who we should—and can—criticize. We seem to think it’s a wide-open field. Anyone stumbling into that field who acts in a manner we wouldn’t is subject to the critical remarks bubbling up within us and, unless we manage to catch ourselves, spewing forth.

Wonderful. As if we needed another karmic enmity.

So who do we criticize? Those we are responsible for, like our children or subordinates at work. Those we have a good affinity with and who are open to our suggestions like some family members, friends, and close co-workers. Those we love and respect, who love and respect us.

If there is a good affinity and we feel someone will welcome our opinions, we offer them. For those with whom the affinity is weaker, or non-existent, we guide through setting examples.

And keep out opinions to ourselves.