I Can't do Everything, But I Can do Something

Oseola McCarty's lined, brown hands, now gnarled with arthritis, bear mute testimony to a lifetime spent washing and ironing other people's clothes.

Less evident is how this quiet, 87-year-old black woman came to donate $150,000 to The University of Southern Mississippi.

"I want to help somebody's child go to college," Miss McCarty said. "I just want it to go to someone who will appreciate it and learn. I'm old and I'm not going to live always."

McCarty's gift establishes an endowed Oseola McCarty Scholarship, with "priority consideration given to those deserving African-American students enrolling at The University of Southern Mississippi who clearly demonstrate a financial need."

"This is just extraordinary," said Southern Miss President Aubrey Lucas. "I don't know that I have ever been as touched by a gift to the university as I am by this one. Miss McCarty has shown great unselfishness and sensitivity in making possible for others the education she never had."

Bill Pace, executive director of the Southern Miss Foundation, which will administer McCarty's gift, said, "This is by far the largest gift ever given to Southern Miss by an African American. We are overwhelmed and humbled by what she has done."

Miss McCarty's gift has astounded even those who believe they know her well. The customers who have brought their washing and ironing to her modest frame home for more than 75 years read like the social register of Hattiesburg. She has done laundry for three generations of some families. In the beginning, she said, she charged $1.50 to $2 a bundle, but, with inflation, the price rose.

"When I started making $10 a bundle -- I don't remember when ... sometime after the war -- I commenced to save money," she recalled. "I put it in savings. I never would take any of it out. I just put it in. It just accumulated."

Actually, she started saving much earlier. Miss McCarty, seated in her small, neat living room -- the linoleum floor gleaming, a spotless pink bedspread pinned carefully over the sofa -- related her story quietly and matter-of-factly.

Born in Wayne County, Miss., on March 7, 1908, she was raised by her mother, Lucy, who moved to Hattiesburg when Oseola was very young. Her mother, she recalls, worked hard to support her young daughter.

"She cooked for Mr. J.S. Garraway, who was Forrest County Circuit Clerk, and ... she would go to the schoolhouse and sell candy to make money. She would leave me alone. I was scared, but she didn't have no choice. I said then that when I could, I would save money so I could take care of my grandmother."

Young Oseola went to school at Eureka Elementary School. Even as a young child, she worked, though, and her savings habit started early.

"I would go to school and come home and iron. I'd put money away and save it. When I got enough, I went to First Mississippi National Bank and put it in. The teller told me it would be best to put it in a savings account. I didn't know. I just kept on saving."

When Oseola was in the sixth grade, her childless aunt had to go to the hospital, and, McCarty said, "I had to go and wait on her. When she came out of the hospital, she couldn't walk, and she needed me."

McCarty never returned to school. "All my classmates had gone off and left me," she said, "so I didn't go back. I just washed and ironed."

Over the years, she put money into several local banks. While banks merged and changed names and management, McCarty's savings grew.

Her grandmother died in 1944, her mother died in 1964, her aunt died in 1967, "and I've been havin' it by myself since then," she said. Her mother and her aunt each left her some money, which she added to her savings. In 1947 her uncle gave her the house in which she still lives.

Bank personnel, realizing that McCarty was accumulating sizeable savings, advised her to put her money into CD's, conservative mutual funds and other accounts where it would work for her.

Meanwhile, McCarty washed and ironed and lived frugally. She has never had a car and still walks everywhere she goes. She shows a visitor the shopping cart she pushes to Big Star, more than a mile away, to get groceries. For the visitor's benefit, she turns on the window air conditioner bank personnel only recently persuaded her to get.

Nancy Odom and Ellen Vinzant of Trustmark Bank have worked with McCarty for several years, not only helping her manage her money but helping look after her personally. It was they who helped her get the air conditioner. They also were concerned about what the future held for her.

"We both talked with her about her funds and what would happen to her if something happened," said Odom. "She knew she needed someone to take care of her."

McCarty, who never married, said, "After my aunt died, I began to think, I didn't have nobody. I began to think about what to do with what little I had. I wanted to leave some to some cousins and my church. But I had been thinking for a long time ... since I was in school ... I didn't know how to fix it, but I wanted to give it to the college (Southern Miss). They used to not let colored people go out there, but now they do, and I think they should have it."

Odom and Vinzant referred Miss McCarty to Paul Laughlin, Trustmark's assistant vice president and trust officer.

"In one of our earliest meetings, I talked about what we could do for her," Laughlin said. "We talked about providing for her if she's not able. Then we turned naturally to what happens to her estate after she dies.

"She said she wanted to leave the bulk of her money to Southern Miss, and she didn't want (anybody) to come in and change her mind. I called Jimmy Frank McKenzie, her attorney -- she's done laundry for him for years -- and he talked to her. He made sure it was her idea. Then I met with her to let her decide how to divide her money up."

McCarty said, "Mr. Paul laid out dimes on the table to explain how to divide it up."

Laughlin said, "I got 10 dimes (to represent percentages). I wrote on pieces of paper the parties she wanted to leave her money to and put them on the table. Then I asked how she wanted her money to be split up. She put one dime on her church and one each for several relatives. Then she said she wanted the rest -- six dimes -- to go to the college. She was quite definite about wanting to give 60 percent to Southern Miss. To my knowledge, she has never been out there, but she seems to have the best of the students in mind. The decision was entirely hers."

"I just want the scholarship to go to some child who needs it, to whoever is not able to help their children," Miss McCarty said. "I'm too old to get an education, but they can."

McCarty signed an irrevocable trust agreement stating her wishes for her estate and giving the bank the responsibility for managing her funds.

"Mr. Paul gives me a check, and I can go get money anytime I need it. My lawyer gave them permission to take care of me if something happens to me."

Laughlin said the bank normally keeps such transactions in strictest confidence, but because of the uniqueness of McCarty's story, he asked for her permission to make it public.

"Well, I guess that would be all right," she said with her typical calm acceptance.

"She seems wonderfully at peace with where she is and who she is," Laughlin said.

McCarty's arthritis in her hands forced her to retire from washing and ironing in December 1994, at the age of 86. Now she spends her days cleaning house, and she still walks everywhere she goes. But she said, "If I ever get able to, I want to go back to work."

She is taking others' excitement over her gift with the same quiet grace that she has taken all the bad and good that have come into her life.

"I can't do everything," she said, "but I can do something to help somebody. And what I can do I will do. I wish I could do more."

http://www.usm.edu/pr/oola1.htm

(To read more about Miss Oseola McCarty, please see http://www.usm.edu/pr/oolamain.htm)

Living Will

Whatever our wishes for our final arrangements, the more we plan and tell others what we wish, the easier it will be for our family members and the more likely what we wish will be carried out. The following is a sample living will for a Pure Land Buddhist, which stresses the importance of not touching the body of the deceased person for a minimum of eight hours. As humans, we are very attached to our bodies, believing they are "I." Thus it can take many hours for the consciousness to completely leave the body. During this time, if we disturb the body in any way, we can cause the person great pain.

Ideally, the deceased will be at home in the final days. Many hospitals are willing to work with families to arrange this. When my mother had a stroke and we were told that she would require feeding tubes, my sister and I both declined as my mother had prepared a living will many years before and we knew what she wanted. I then said I wished to take my mother home for her final days. The hospice I selected was able to very quickly make arrangements with the hospital after the hospital staff verified that there was a living will. 

If conditions are not ideal, the presence of a living will will help family members know what the person wished so the best possible arrangements can be made. And of course, preparing a living will and discussing it in advance with family members will help family members who have different beliefs clearly undersatdn the individual's wishes so they may honor them.

Living Will

To my family and all those concerned with my care: I, __________________________________, of ____________________________________________ being of sound mind, make this statement as a directive to be followed if for any reason I become unable to participate in decisions regarding my medical care.

Upon my death and transition into the next life, I do not wish to be reborn as a ghost path or an animal. I do not wish to suffer. Instead, I wish to follow Amitabha Buddha and to arrive at his Western Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss. To all my family and friends, I wish to ask for your assistance so that I may not suffer, but instead remain calm and peaceful to prepare for my arrival to the Western Pure Land.

In the event that I should suffer from a terminal illness to the extent that doctors foresee no possible recovery, I ask that no medical treatment be undertaken. Should I already be in the hospital at this point, I wish to be checked out and brought home. Please notify my assigned family member or friend __________________________________
at telephone number(s) ________________________ and _________________________.

Once home, please position me in the most comfortable, natural position in which I may rest. The assigned family member or friend will lead others in chanting “Amituofo.” Should I decline to the point where I lose consciousness and am no longer aware of my surroundings, the assigned family member or friend shall have full authority in making any decisions regarding my well-being. If this person cannot be contacted, please find a Buddhist master or Buddhist believer to aid in the chanting of “Amituofo” until the assigned person can be reached.

Within twenty-four hours prior to and after my death, I would like to ask my friends and family to comply with the following:

1. Do not touch or move my body or even my bed.

2. Do not change my clothing.

3. Do not place dry ice or other substances on my body. Sandalwood incense may be burned if there is any odor.

4. Do not let a breeze blow directly onto my body.

5. Do not allow the scent of alcohol, onions, scallions, garlic, or chives to enter the room.

6. Do not smoke, cry, or talk in the room.

My purpose for asking this is to create an atmosphere in which I may remain calm and at peace. The only sound I wish to hear is “Amituofo,” so that he may escort me to the Pure Land.

If I am at home upon my death, my family should take turns chanting “Amituofo” for eight to twenty-four hours. At this point, I will be ready to be moved, washed, and dressed. This period of chanting is the best time to assist me to be calm and peaceful. All funeral arrangements can be made afterwards. If I should pass away in the hospital, please follow hospital policy and chant as much as is allowed.

During my terminal illness and within forty-nine days after my death, all family members should adopt a vegetarian diet. I do not wish for any killing to be associated with my death. All funeral offerings must be vegetarian. The use of alcohol is strictly prohibited. Funeral arrangements should be kept simple, and proper Buddhist etiquette should be followed. I do not wish for any unnecessary excess.

Within forty-nine days following my death, I sincerely ask my family members and friends to seek my rebirth into the Pure Land, and to perform good deeds such as giving offerings to the Three Jewels of the Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha, printing sutras, helping the needy, and so on. These good deeds will help me to attain additional good karma, and further assist me in arriving at the Pure Land. Most important is for my family to sincerely chant “Amituofo.”

In order for me to benefit the most and to peacefully arrive at the Pure Land, the above points must be followed. This will not only benefit me but all those involved as well. In this manner, I wish for everyone to learn and to believe in Buddhism. Thus, everyone can arrive at the Pure Land, as well.

Amituofo to all.

These directions express my legal right to request or refuse treatment. Therefore, I expect my family, doctor, and all those concerned with my care to regard themselves as legally and morally bound to act in accord with my wishes.

Signed______________________________________

Date_________________

Witness: I declare that the person who signed this document, or asked another to sign this document on his or her behalf, did so in my presence and that he or she appears to be of sound mind and free of duress or undue influence.

Witness_____________________________________

Date_________________

Like the Lingering Scent of Wine

In The Mind Heart Disconnect, I wrote:

A few days, I was listening to a translation of Master Chin Kung’s talk by one of my fellow nuns. Teacher was talking about a high level of bodhisattvas who no longer had any thoughts of selfishness, greed, anger, ignorance, or arrogance. But the habit of these afflictions is still there. So even these higher level bodhisattvas still have habits. They do not act on these habits or have thoughts that arise from them, but the traces of the habits still exist.

A few days ago, Teacher spoke again on this and used the example of a wine bottle.

These traces of habits, residual habits, are like the odor of wine remaining in the bottle even after it is washed out. It takes time to gradually eliminate that remaining odor. During this time after the wine is gone, the former trace of it still remains.

Just as a wine bottle that has been thoroughly washed and left open to the air will gradually lose even the last lingering scent of the wine, our residual habits that are not acted upon will linger and then, with time, even the traces will be gone. With all traces gone, the bottle will be completely clean, the mind perfectly pure.

The Merest Shimmer of Thought

Since stillness is our permanent true nature, it is the goal of our practice to return to stillness. This seems simple enough on the surface. We just need to calm our minds down until they are tranquil. Reading this and noticing the thoughts that come and go, we might tell ourselves, okay just one thought after another, I can do this, I can eliminate these thoughts.

But the reality is that the thoughts we notice are only the most obvious ones, the tip of the iceberg so to speak.

Our thoughts are vibrations. The ones we are aware of are, in actuality, far from representative of the majority. The ones we notice are akin to the shattering of the sound barrier—an immense sonic boom that can be detected for miles. Like a mental sonic boom, the vibrations from these thoughts of ours can even be detected by those near us.

For example, as an angry person walks by, you might well feel like you are encountering a wall of anger the vibrations are so strong. These are the thoughts that we are most familiar with. The ones as clear the conversations we hold in our heads.

But these are by no means the only thoughts we have. Actually there are many more thoughts in any moment. As the Buddha explained, we have over a trillion thoughts in the time it takes to snap our fingers. Yes, that many.

How often have you sensed a thought but were unable to grasp it. It was gone so quickly that you were aware of it’s arising but could not determine what it was. You just sensed that something had been in your mind. And then it was gone, impossible to recall. From here the thought vibrations become finer and finer until they get to the point that only an enlightened being can detect them. They are the merest of vibrations, a mere shimmer of thought, beyond our ability to even imagine.

So it turns out that there are uncountable degrees of increasingly subtle thoughts, of subtle vibrations. It’s not possible to wrestle them into oblivion one at a time since we can’t even detect them. Instead, we need to focus the mind through our meditative concentration. By doing this, we will change the state of our mind so the thoughts, the vibrations, very gradually cease to arise.

Wisdom from the Master

• Today, people might ask, “Why should I help others?” They do not understand the true re­ality of life and the universe, thinking others and they are not one, so why should they help? This is similar to one’s left hand being bitten by a mosquito. Would the right hand help to shoo away the mosquito or would it ask, “Why should I help the left hand, it isn’t me?” As worldly people, we have deluded thoughts and behavior, not realizing that all sentient beings and we are one entity.

• We are born to receive our karmic results that we have previously planted. Our good karmas result in comfort and happiness. Our bad karmas result in hardship. But how many people willingly receive and accept these consequences? If we are unwilling to accept the results from our past karmic deeds then we are in the process of creating new karmas.

• Trying to achieve awakening through two different methods is like trying to enter the cultivation hall through two different doors. It cannot be done.

• The Buddha appeared in this world for one reason: to light the lamp of truth, thus to lead us away from the darkness of our own ignorance.

• The Buddha's light spreads throughout the universe. What about us? Our wandering, deluded and deviated thoughts likewise spread throughout the universe.

• The mind of a Buddha is like still water. It can sense the slightest vibration from our mind. Our minds are so agitated that we cannot even tell when we are hit by a major thought wave.

• In life after life we have had relationships with all sentient beings. Some are good affinities; some are bad. We encounter beings who are easy to be with. This is due to the good affinity we previously planted. We also encounter beings who are difficult to be with. This is due to the bad affinity we previously planted because we were confused and deluded. But now we know how to resolve these bad affinities through filial piety and respect.

• One then should not attach to either good or bad deeds, because good would have one go to the upper three realms (heavens, As­uras and humans), and bad karma to the lower three realms (animals, hungry ghosts and hells). However, whichever way, we are still mired in reincarna­tion.

• To be patient is not just to be patient with others but to be patient with our own practice as well.

• Stillness is our true permanent nature. We practice concentration to return to this stillness.

• Buddhas and Bodhisattvas are around us all the time. In our lives when we encounter hardships someone may walk by and give us exactly the advice we needed to hear. If we ask them why they said it, they would say they didn't know. This is how Buddhas and Bodhisattvas help us.

~ Based on the teachings of Venerable Master Chin Kung