a buddhist perspective

In yesterday’s entry, I spoke of repentance in a general sense. We apologize to the person for having done something wrong with “I’m sorry,” not just a mumbled “sorry.” By saying we are sorry or writing a note of apology, we are regretting our actions.

Buddhists often take this one step further. In front of an image of the Buddha, the practitioner recalls what he or she has thought, said, or done wrong. This remembering is often done as one is prostrating. The practitioner then vows not to repeat the behavior.

Since the practitioner is just that—a practitioner—he or she will most likely repeat the mistakes and, thus, not keep those vows. When this happens, getting upset doesn’t help. Repeat the repentance practice and make the vow again.

Keep expressing your regret, vowing, and trying to keep those vows. With practice, we will gradually get better at correcting our wrongdoings.

When things do not go our way while interacting with others, we often end up in a bad mood and become angry. If we are being mindful and realize what is happening while there is still time to recoup, we can try something different.

When we have done something wrong, we can say “I’m sorry.” I realize that this sounds simplistic, but think about it. How often do we say we’re sorry? And mean it. Maybe we just say “Sorry.” Very noncommittal. Not to mention unclear. Does it mean we’re sorry or that the other person should be sorry? While “sorry” is better than nothing, it lacks the spoken ownership and our regret for our having done something wrong.

Hopefully, our realization of having behaved badly will lead to our wanting to improve what has just become an upsetting situation for all involved. An often difficult, but more useful alternative than justifying our actions, is available.

Look the other person in the eye, speak clearly, and say sincerely “I’m sorry.”

Question: In Chinese Buddhism the concept of repentance and repentance ceremonies seem to be very important. Are there any specifically Pure Land approaches to repentance?

Response: There is a beautifully moving repentance verse in the Avatamsaka Sutra:

All evil actions committed by me since time immemorial,
stemming from greed, anger, and ignorance,
arising from body, speech, and mind,
I deeply repent having committed.

Personally, I find that saying this verse and prostrating along with my practice of chanting "Amituofo" to be deeply moving.

Also, talk to those you have hurt. After saying the verse, tell them how deeply you regret the harm you have done. Ask all those you harmed to please not obstruct you on your path to rebirth in the Pure Land, and Buddhahood. Explain that seeking revenge for past harm will only bring future retaliation, which is of no benefit to them. Ask them to please allow you to practice so you can dedicate the merits to them and to all those who suffer. And assure them that upon attaining that rebirth you will come back to help them also end suffering and attain happiness.

"In the Visualization Sutra we learn that in ancient India, King Ajatasatru killed his father, attempted to kill his mother, and caused dissension in the Sangha. He would stop at nothing. At the last moment of his life, with just one remaining breath, the king truly regretted and attained single-mindedness of Buddha Amitabha as he sought rebirth into the Pure Land. He was reborn into the second highest level of the Pure Land. Inconceivable!

From this, we know that there are two ways to be reborn into the Pure Land. One way is to cultivate and accumulate merits and virtues daily, and to follow the regular way of practice to seek rebirth into the Pure Land. The other way is for those who have committed egregious evil deeds to feel intense regret at the last moments of their life.

Therefore, do not look down on those who have committed wrongdoings. Perhaps at the last moment of their lives, their ability to feel deep remorse will be so strong that they may attain a higher level of rebirth than we can. This is very possible. It is said that a prodigal who returns home is more precious than gold. Ordinary people cannot be compared with them. Thus, we cannot look down on those who have committed wrongdoings."

~ Master Chin Kung

Our greed, our ignorance, our hatred all arise from our selfishness, from our sub-conscious desire to control other people, animals, even inanimate objects. By letting go of this attachment, we can be liberated.

Awakened beings live lives of great contentment. They fulfill their responsibility of educating sentient beings by explaining to them the true reality of life and the universe, and that every cause—every thought, word, and action—has a result.

They teach us that we have a wondrous and rare chance that is about to slip by us. To be born as human beings who are able to hear the teachings is an unbelievably rare opportunity, not encountered for millions of years. It is as rare as a bubble rising to the surface of a vast sea and breaking the surface of that sea within the one wreath of flowers that is floating upon it.

Allowing this to happen will be a tragic mistake that is entirely of our own making. To prevent this from happening, we need to reflect and feel remorse for our mistakes. This will enable us to overcome our afflictions and bad habits, and thus to remove our negative karma. Feel deep regret for our mistakes, vow to not commit them again, and nurture the heart of sincerity, purity, impartiality, compassion, and awakening. Only with this heart will we be able to solve all problems. They cannot be solved by killing, by war. They are solved with gentleness and loving-kindness toward all other beings.

Our every thought needs to be of benefiting all sentient-beings. We should never even have a single hostile thought or say anything that can cause distress to others. If we can truly follow this teaching then in our daily lives no matter what we do, there will be great goodness, great gentleness. This is the way to truly influence people, with love and compassion.