If you wouldn’t want others
to hear what you’re saying about them,
most likely it shouldn’t be said.
Don’t gossip. Okay, that’s simple. Or is it? Is saying something nice about someone gossiping? Some people might say yes, others no. So how do we decide whether to say something about another person? One simple way is to ask ourselves if we would say it in front of the person. Aside from exceptions like not discussing what we’ll be giving a child for his birthday in front of him, this guideline works well. If we’d be mortified or regretful or upset with ourself for speaking out, then we shouldn’t. If the other person might feel hurt or defensive or angry, then we shouldn’t. If there is even a chance of upsetting the other person in any way, then we shouldn’t. Notice a pattern? It’s “We shouldn’t.” Unless the person would thank us for what we just said or with twinkling eyes, smile happily, or feel the need to demur humbly, then we shouldn’t. So yes, it was simple after all.